Just think, If it wasn't for THIS GUY, we wouldn't have some of the greatest music, art, film... Orson Bean!

Albert Hofmann, Is That Guy, he was the pioneering Swiss chemist who discovered the hallucinogenic properties of LSD!

He died Tuesday at the age of 102.

See? LSD must have robbed him of life, who knows how long he could have lived if he hadn't experimented all the time?

While researching a lysergic acid compound, he inadvertently absorbed a bit through his fingertips. Three days later, he ingested 250 milligrams of LSD, embarking on the first full-fledged acid trip. That day became known among LSD fans as "bicycle day" because Hofmann began experiencing the drug's intense effects on his bicycle trip home from the lab.

He was Green, before Green was cool!

Hofmann remembered his discovery this way:

"In a dreamlike state, with eyes closed, I perceived an uninterrupted stream of fantastic pictures, extraordinary shapes with intense, kaleidoscopic play of colors. After some two hours this condition faded away."

He still referred to LSD as "medicine for the soul."

"LSD wanted to tell me something. It gave me an inner joy, an open mindedness, a gratefulness, open eyes and an internal sensitivity for the miracles of creation."

Read the full story, that you just know will soon be a film, at WIRED.

My Super Hot and former Insurance Agent's Secretary always sends me fun emails. I don't really like posting these things, because I'm sure everyone gets them in their email, but I liked it so:

THE BEST [actual] HEADLINES OF 2007:

Crack Found on Governor's Daughter
[Imagine that!]


Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
[No, really?]

Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
[Now that's taking things a bit far!]

Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus?
[Not if I wipe thoroughly!]

Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over
[What a guy!]

Miners Refuse to Work after Death
[No-good-for-nothing' lazy so-and-so!]


Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
[See if that works any better than a fair trial!]


War Dims Hope for Peace
[I can see where it might have that effect!]


If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile
[You think?]


Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures
[Who would have thought!]

Enfield ( London ) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide
[They may be on to something!]


Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges
[You mean there's something stronger than duct tape?]


Man Struck By Lightning: Faces Battery Charge
[he probably IS the battery charge!]


New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group
[Weren't they fat enough?!]


Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
[That's what he gets for eating those beans!]


Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
[Taste like chicken?]


Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
[Chainsaw Massacre all over again!]


Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors
[Boy, are they tall!]


And the winner is....

Typhoon Rips Through
Cemetery; Hundreds Dead

Man, YouTube sure Closes Accounts at the drop of a hat, don't they?

Been having a blast lately finding my work from the past that total strangers are posting, then I share the link with friends, only to find "Account Closed" or "Account Suspended."

Just found an awesome clip of Penelope Cruz in the nude from some movie I have to see, but I went back to it later, when I was planning a special private moment, It had been deleted.

I was all sexed up, too! Had candles burning. Lotion. Scented oils. Then NOTHING!

Ended up watching a clip of a Panda sneezing and rolled over all Blue-Balled and went to bed.

Some people can be so tough.

There's this girl that works the music department at the local Barnes and Noble who thinks she's the shit.

Once, I heard some cool groovy music playing and went into her area to look at the "What's Playing" display.

"Oh, it's not up there. This is something I'm playing. It's my mix CD."

"What is it, sounds cool?" I asked.

With her eyelids half closed and a smirk on her face, "I seriously doubt you've ever heard of them, they're from Finland."

She walked away stocking stuff on the shelf.

"Hey, I like music, I might want to get this."

She let's out a big sigh, "Uhh, It's called, UGG and that stands for Underground Groovement. Okay?"

Now every time I go to B&N, if I see her in there doing her lil' retail gig, I turn around. It's like she thinks she's programming KCRW or some Sirius Channel by picking what CDs to pop in the cradle and sit in the "What's Playing" display.

Serious attitude!

Been thinking of riding a bike to save gas and get exercise.

I have to trick myself into the idea that I'm being Green and that I'll save money on gas, because if I thought I was only doing it for exercise, I'd never get on a bike. It'd be collecting dust like all the exercise equipment I ever bought that I ended up using to hang my t-shirts on to dry.

Also, who am I kidding? I'm living on a farm on a dirt road 5000 miles from anywhere I want to be riding a bike.

Yet I dream of being on a bike like all my LA friends are doing now.

At a WalMart I find a Mongoose Bike that looks kinda cool with its deconstructed frame and shock absorbers and stuff I'm sure I'll need. It was sitting outside next to the Garden Center just teasing me with its Silver shinny look bright in the sunlight.

I asked a young guy moving lawn equipment, probably the youngest employee of WalMart I've ever seen, if it was okay to try it on for size?

"Go for it!"

I swing my leg over it and sit. It feels good to be on a bike. I like it. It's the perfect size for me. The pedals are in the right place. My arms are the perfect length to reach the handle bars without looking desperate. This could be my bike.

I push off to try and do a short loop, but the bike jerks out from under me and I fall sideways to the concrete scratching my left cheek in the spill.

"You okay?"

Seems there is a policy of attaching a small cable to the rear wheel to prevent theft.

These Mormon Guys sure got something going on!

These scary old farts must have some mighty powerful Seduction Skills to be getting these young hot girls in their, "long Little House on the Prairie dresses and makeover needing looks."

Those that don't have some goofy religion thing to back up their jive sometimes have to resort to locking the poor girl up in the fruit cellar and never letting her see the light of day. That can be good if you like porcelain skin or that Goth look!

Meeting girls should be easier than this!

I know I don't wanna be tied down and I don't wanna tie anyone down.

But I'm working on my own Sex Cult Religion idea, however it's hard to come up with one that doesn't sound too silly. Every time I start typing out ideas for my new church, I start giggling and can't stop.

Here's the trailer for the movie, "The Creeps" that I voiced!

I had a full large cup to go of iced tea from a coffee shop where I met to talk with my oldest brother, as I was leaving the dark sky let loose a heavy rain.

In my car I realized I was hungry so I pulled into the drive thru of a Captain D's and got a Classic Fish Sandwich and parked in an empty lot as the rain pounded on my car.

I ate sitting alone in my car in the rain.

Everything was distorted through the water on the windshield, but I could see a girl having an argument with her boyfriend by the back door of an office. Both of them were talking and their arms flailed violently.

My radio had somehow been tuned to an unused frequency on the AM Band and with every flash of lightning, crackles of static came from my speakers. It sounded like patties of hamburger meat being flipped on a skillet.

Watched "Vanilla Sky" again today, I do this every once in a while because the film means a lot to me. I'm nothing like any of the characters in the film, but somehow this movie is about me.

At least I feel it's part of me.

This song, "The Nothing Song"/"Njósnavélin" by Sigur Ros really gets to me.

When I was younger and poorer, I was in a Irish Pub and sitting next to me at the bar were two pretty women and one was enthusiastically telling her friend about this woman she met that changed her life by using NLP on her.

I didn't know what NLP was but I kept listening because it sounded so SciFi.

For about an hour I eavesdropped on her tales of this mystical mystery woman tapping on different parts of her body and reprogramming her mind. It sounded so wild!

She said the body was like a keyboard and the mind was like software, or something like that.

They got up to leave and I confessed to overhearing them and asked how I could meet the woman she was talking about. She pulled out a pen and on a napkin wrote the name and number and told me she had a workshop coming up and I should call tomorrow as it was sure to fill up.

They left and the bartender High-Fived me thinking I just got her number.

I called the woman's people and found out how expensive it was. Way too much for me! I was depressed and picked up my spirits by walking around the neighborhood and dumpster diving.

There was a lil' stray dog that lived in the area and everybody loved it because it sat on one street corner near On the Border and did funny tricks on its own to get treats from people leaving. A guy reached in his take home box and pulled out some chicken and gave it to the dog who was now doing flips. His girlfriend laughed and the guy said, "This fella's a survivor! He's so inventive, he'll find a way!"

Somehow when he said that, the idea of me getting into this NLP Workshop without paying popped in my head!

I called back and said if I videotaped the NLP Workshop for them, would they be interested? They said, No. Why? They didn't want to pay me for it. I told them, I'd do it for free if they just let me take it. Oh...

I was in!

For weeks I recorded the courses and witness some mini miracles, but being that I wasn't partaking in any of the exercises I felt I was missing something. I wanted to learn more about NLP. I read some books, or rather tried to read some books about it. It was tough.

There was a few techniques she demonstrated on a man with financial troubles that stayed with me and I used them by accident, or rather as a goof on someone and I can't describe it, but through a very complex web of events the dominoes fell into place that lead me to start making the most money I ever made before.

But after a few years I sabotaged myself.

Been thinking about getting back into learning more NLP. I've been watching some great things about Paul McKenna, who use to be a DJ on a station that I did voice work for back in the day, and now he's the biggest selling non fiction author in the UK.

Check out his videos!

I was reading this very funny article about his book, "I Can Make You Rich!" and there was a great bit about getting back at cruel teachers:

"McKenna liked his parents, but hated school. Specifically, he hated the Catholic comprehensive run by Jesuit priests that he attended, a place “run on a mindset of guilt, where everyone was constantly put down and made to feel not good enough”.

He quotes one of his school reports which said: “If he carries on like this, he’ll never amount to anything.” When, several years later, he published his first book, he sent a copy to his English teacher with “F*** you” written inside the front cover. “Very childish, I know, but also very satisfying.”"

Once, when I was someone of note, I was on a panel and I was asked by a College Newspaper Reporter if I could be anyone, Who would I want to be?

I answered Alejandro Jodorowsky!

No one around me knew who I was talking about, but I've always loved the director, writer, actor of cult classics like "El Topo" and "The Holy Mountain".

His "Fando & Lis" had a pretty scary poster! Recently friends of mine have gone ape-shit over a poster for Robert Sigl's "The Spider" and that just reminded me of it.

Been thinking again...

Maybe you can help on this one.

Today I was reading a very good article in Mother Earth News about growing your favorite food plants in self-watering containers. They even show you how!

I was wondering if anyone has tried, or even if it's possible, to live on what they grow if... Now, what for it:

...They were to live in say a small apartment?

Imagine growing everything you have to eat within the confines of say a patio/balcony.

Turn an extra bedroom into nursery with lights. Imagine the surprise when DEA agents burst in and discover you're just growing salads!

While I'm on a "walk down memory lane" kick...

I found my voice on this awesome Toy Commercial!

Because I have no Dish, no cable, and no TV, I watch everything on my PowerBook G4!

I watch DVDs on it.

I watch a lot of iTunes on it.

And I watch a ton of YouTube stuff!

On a search for fun things to watch, I came across this by complete chance...

A voice from the past. My voice on an old Full Moon Picture logo someone had posted.

Check it out!

I use to do trailers and narration for them back in the good old days. Boy, I'd like to find all of the voice work I did for them and post them here.

David Lynch and singer/songwriter Donovan discuss transcendental meditation.

Pretty awesome stuff!

Everyone knows this by now, but I make little guided meditation mp3s and a week ago I created a real doozy!

It has some rain and storm sounds I recorded here in Tornado Alley, sounds of rushing water, which just happened to be raging through my brother's front yard during the flood, and me with a new relaxation induction I wrote and voiced about walking down into a cool cave with only a flickering lantern.

After a few minutes the text and my voice fade off and it's just the sound of wind and distant rain through a "flange" effect, leaving my mind to create something to fill the gap. I'm asleep at this point and the dreams are lucid and slightly controllable.

This one dream was so powerful, I woke up to see if it was real.

After being down in the cave, I was driving at night, wipers beating, through a foggy dark wooded road and I pull up to a grocery store. I go in and I want to eat something healthy. I go to the vegetable department. The clerk there tells me, "If you want to be healthy, what you need is through that door."

Going through it, I'm out in the morning light just before sunrise, in a field. I see a woman in a summer hat picking wild flowers. She gets up and turns to me and it's my mother. Younger and very happy.

We sit on a hillside. She's barefooted. Wind is blowing waves across the acres of wheat like ripples in a pond. We watch it. She's so pretty. She looks at me and she's talking, her mouth is moving, but I can't hear her.

The wind is getting louder. There's a rushing in my ears that's deafening. I start to panic. I'm missing something important. The sound of the wind becomes static. The wind blows me back and I begin falling down the hill, but I'm gliding over the tips of wheat. I'm being carried aloft like a plastic grocery bag. Up into the clouds spiraling backwards.

I wake up.

Ricky Gervais is my fucking hero!

Been watching all the episodes of, "Extras" and I've never laughed so hard before. I mean it just hurt! I thought I was going to die!

The stuff between him and Ashley Jensen is so sweet, you want them to just give up and admit they belong together, but you also know they couldn't make it together other than friends.

When she accidentally sabotages (?) his big break with the BBC and Andy unloads his anger at Ashley in her messy apartment, I was choked up and teary eyed. He tells her to grow up and stay out of his life, then we see her taking her posters off the wall, throwing her toys away and using the iron to straighten her curly hair. I almost lost it!

Ricky's character Andy loves Robert Deniro and David Bowie, but you know that's Ricky bleeding through.

Bowie is brilliant in a, "Never meet your idol" scene.

Winding down from a Ricky Gervais Marathon, I relaxed with some Bowie and Billy Corgan, then went to sleep.

People can be so strange.

Ever have people ask you whether you've filed your Taxes yet? They're just hoping that you'll say, No, so they can "One-Up" you by saying, "I did mine Months ago!"

I absolutely hate people when they get that Holier than Thou look just because they woke up earlier than you. They look at the clock and turn to you smirking, "Well, Good Morning."

I hate that commercial where there's a hot girl with a guy and she says, "I take it because I have Genital Herpes..." And her dude pops up and goes, "...And I don't!"

Like, good for you pal, rub it in! Hurt her a little more!

I hate Cops that pull you over and ask, "Do you know why I stopped you?"

Can't stand women that flip out thinking you're staring at their boobs, when you're just trying to read the text on that oh so funny t-shirt they bought at Urban Outfitters.

Okay, I'm done for now.

Anyone that knows me, and there are few, know I love Hammer Films!

Hammer has an amazing history!

I remember a couple, husband and wife, came to my school when I was in 7th Grade and brought, "Horror of Dracula" starring Peter Cushing, Christopher Lee and directed by Terence Fisher and played it in the gymnasium.

They charged probably $1 and I think we all got free popcorn. Kids went crazy! Screaming. Fighting. No one but me and a few others even watched it, but I loved it! I don't think I'd seen colors like that in movies before. And it was probably a scratched up 16mm print, too.

I even help the couple pack up their projector and screen afterwards and carry it to their car. I took it that they traveled around showing movies at night in different schools.

I thought that'd be the life!

Was there ever anyone cooler, with the most awesome face, than Peter Cushing? He was perfect as Sherlock Holmes!

I know I was a weird kid, but I distinctly remember fantasizing that I owned a house with a laboratory in the basement and Cushing would mentor me on creating a girlfriend. I know he must have been the sweetest man.

I wish I could find the rest of this!

Peter Cushing, This is Your Life!

I love this guy, Derren Brown!

Here one of my favorite people, Simon Pegg gets the old Jedi Mind Trick!

Very cool to the very end! Just AWESOME!

I want to learn this stuff in the worst way! Not just to get girls to drop their panties, but I'd like to program myself to be smarter, cooler, oh and then get some girls to show me their Lady Business!

I was worried all day that there might be some kind of terrorist attack somewhere in the World, because today is 4-11.

411 means information, right?

Maybe they'd bomb something that stores our personal info? Like Credit Bureaus, the IRS, or the Nigerian Spammers...

Hmmmm...

Wish there was a drug I could take to make me feel the way I know I'm suppose to be!

I'm just so unhappy about everything!

You're tired of reading about it, think about me... I have to live in this body All... The... TIME!

There's this 17 year old girl I see quite a bit and she likes to sit and talk to me. Who doesn't? Anyway, she was telling me about her life; Pregnant at 12, Dad's a drug user, Black boyfriend, Racist friends...

Her life is a real struggle, but she's so happy!

"How do you not let it all get you down?" I ask.

"Every Sunday me, my baby and my Six sisters get together and go to Church, that's fun seeing them, oh and I also smoke a lot of pot..."

She thinks, stares out the window and adds, "...I guess that keeps me happy."

The fan in my Honda just stopped working.

I turned the AC on in my car because it's been getting a little warm here and with the flood waters laying stagnant, it's getting a bit humid.

The fan started then just went FffttThump!!! Like something clogged it up.

So my brother and I took the fan out using some special Honda Allen Wrench Tool-thingy. And get this, the fan is called a Squirrel Cage, or something like that. We pulled it out and...

I get shivers even telling you this, but somehow, I guess with all the flooding, some Mice found their way into my car and built a dirty, filthy, stinking nest in my AC Vents and it got sucked up into the fan!

GROSS!!!

Remember "Friday's" ABC's LIVE version of SNL?

I used to watch it and liked it a lot. I saw this show, the one with Andy Kaufman that was recreated in "Man on the Moon" with Jim Carrey. In school on that next Monday we all wondered what was going on with Andy.

My friends and I were really into Andy Kaufman at the time. Followed everything he did. He was such a mystery to us and we couldn't get enough. Even Johnny Cash thought Andy was cool!

What's really funny about the first clip is seeing Larry David at the end of the show looking kinda lost and out of it.

Been watching this Dirk Bogarde documentary and eating Swiss Rolls in bed.

Very much in a dark depressed place right now.

Trying to get out of it.

Picked up, "Happier than God!" by Neale Donald Walsch and I've been trying to read it, but my eyes just won't have any of it.

Feel asleep and dreamed the book had all my answers, but it turned out it was actually, "Happier than Rod!"

Which seemed quite easy to attain once I was introduced to Rod at a book signing. He seemed down, sad, mumbling, distracted, confused, then suddenly, I WAS ROD!

I was trapped!

I tried to run out of the store and my dream, but I was signing a book for an old hag that was sitting on my chest, sucking the life out of me and I could barely write, and I saw that I wrote, "IMROD" in the book.

I can't wait to see this!

"Mister Lonely"

He's one of my favorite filmmakers!

I know people that hated him for his NRA stuff, but for me...



I grew up watching everything he did and I thought he Rocked!

I use to play this game as a kid.

Found this online and I can't stop!!!

Connect 4

I know it's not World of WarCraft, but... Hope you don't get addicted!

My rash is still with me.

Thanks for the cards and letters!

Everyone tells me it's an allergy, or that I ate something that I'm allergic to, but the medicine I'm taking is for stress. Well, I've had that!

In Wal-Mart I found some Blue Gloves for exfoliating the skin, so I thought I'd get them and use their sandpaper-like abrasiveness and peel my friggin' flesh off!

I had them for a few days forgetting to take them into the shower with me, because frankly, it seems like a stupid and Gay idea.

However, the pain of the rash was so great I finally did it in a fit of rage!

Looking like a Michael Jackson/Smurph Imitator (Big Fat Blue Gloves) I soaped up and scraped all my skin to a Pink and slightly bleeding hue.

It really felt good!

I was and am still all tingly!

These last few weeks, my "Voice in Your Head" website that sells my voicework to producers of commercials and stuff has been bombarded with Hits like you wouldn't believe!

I thought, I MUST BE IN DEMAND!

Soon I'll be rolling in the big money!

All the stats for that page climb higher everyday!

Turns out Oprah may be the cause!

Oprah is doing these podcasts with the author of "The Power of Now," Eckhart Tolle and it's called "A New Earth Web Event" or something.

Evidently, he has a term he calls "The Voice in Your Head" and everyone that loves him from around the World are for some reason searching that term. I guess to buy that URL!

I hope Oprah offers me a Million Dollars for it!

Then, I'll know "The Secret" has been working for me!

No April Fool's prank from me this year!

None played on me either!

Life is getting boring.