Halloween is my favorite holiday of the year!

Wish I used it better. I wish I'd dress up and go to parties and have fun. I don't.

I'd like to sit and watch scary movies with friends, if I had any. Here's a list of my all time favorite scary movies:


"The Wicker Man" the one from the 70s

"The Haunting" the one from the 60’s

"Halloween" the one from the 70's

"Eyes Without a Face"

"Planet of the Vampires"

"Theatre of Blood"

"The Other"

"The Others"

"The Exorcist"

"Daughter of Horror"

"Quatermass and the Pit/Five Million Years to Earth"

"I Walked with a Zombie"

"Black Sunday"

"Un Chien Andalou"

"The Devil Rides Out"

"Curse of the Demon"

"The Elephant Man"

"Eraserhead"

"Jaws"

"Alien"

"Alice, Sweet Alice"

"The Innocents"

"The Brood"

"Village of the Damned"

"Rosemary's Baby"

"Repulsion"

"Phantasm"

"Don't Look Now"

"The Shining"

"Near Dark"

"Nosferatu the Vampyre"

"Audition"

"The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari"

"Seven"

"Zodiac"

"Psycho"

"Meshes of the Afternoon"

There! Go watch them and then you'll understand me a little bit more. I think you can learn a lot about a person by their favorite movie lists.

Watched a few movies. Thought I'd mention them to you.

Woody Allen's "Hollywood Ending" "Anything Else" and "The Curse of the Jade Scorpion"

"The Hoax" with Richard Gere and Alfred Molina.

"The Last Picture Show"

Been reading Peter Bogdanovich's book, "Who the Hell's in it"

Paul Malmont's, "The Chinatown Death Cloud Peril"

Harold Robbins', "The Dream Merchants"

Michael Korda's, "Success"

Also loaded up my iPod with two Art Bell radio shows with two guests that record ghost EVPs and one about a ranch where creatures crawl out of holes in the sky and eat cows.

All this stuff and I still manage enough time to wipe my ass properly!

Not much of a drinker. I mean, I get drunk way too easy. Had a couple of Mandarin Cosmopolitans the other night and loved it!

Then, went out to a dinner tonight with my family where the food arrived cold. Sent it back and it came back cold again! Horrible service!

But I drank two margaritas and felt them! Felt them good in my veins and brain!

Then jumped in my car and drove my brother and his wife around town when I know I shouldn't have. I knew this because about ten minutes into the drive my brother said something about how dim my lights were. I then turned my headlights on. It was only about 10PM but there was a lot of ambient city light.

If I could afford it, I'd drink myself to death.

The Springfield Acting Workshop Meetup Group now has a MySpace page just for you to join!

Hurry and climb aboard, because now it's just Tom and Jerry and that's kinda sad. So Add Me quick!

This Ghost video is one of the most popular on the web!

It's mine and I put it up!

I have many video involving ghosts, spirits, EVPs and stuff, many I haven't edited yet.

Been getting lots of emails about using some of these video on TV shows. Fox in LA wants to use the ghost video for a show they're putting together, but I haven't even responded.

I just don't care.

It's mine and if people want to see it, they can simple come here.

I'm not looking for attention. If they find me, fine with me.

There's a bookstore downtown called, The Well Fed Head and killing time before meeting a new friend for drinks, I stopped in to post a flyer for my Acting Workshop.

Just inside the door a familiar book catches my eye and it's Richard Laymon's "Night in the Lonesome October" a book I'm very fond of because I'm one of the people it's dedicated to.

My name is right THERE printed in that book! And it's October and I've been lonesome!

I used to be sad when I would see one of his books, or a new one come out, because it would remind me how sad it is to not have him around. I know he'd be so happy to see how even more popular his is, more so than when he was alive, maybe.

Now when I find his books, I feel like they're good omens, or maybe he's watching out for me.

The bookstore owner then asked me if I'd be interested in judging a short story competition they are setting up...

Thanks Richard! I know it was you! You lil' Angel/Devil!

Sometimes, well most of the time, I think the Universe revolves around me.

ME!

I'm such a "Zelig" wanting to please everyone and hoping everyone loves me.

ME!

Worrying whether I come off okay when I meet new people.

me...

If I'm out in public and I hear a group of girls giggling behind me, I'm concerned if they're laughing at me.

If someone is watching a movie I love and they say, "I hate this film!" I sometimes take it personally, as if I made the movie.

If I see the Cops in my rearview mirror with lights flashing, I breakout in cold sweat thinking it's about me.

Me?

Many years ago there was a young girl I was so in love with. She was so beautiful and wonderful. Everyone thought we were going to be together forever.

One night after a Cocteau Twins concert we made love and the morning came too soon and I had to go to work. I was so happy! I realized I left a tape and started back to her place, I stepped up on her porch and started to ring the bell, but through an open window I heard her crying. Bawling! Loud gasping sobs!

I stopped.

Weird thoughts raced through my head.

I thought she was crying because she felt bad for having made love to me. Maybe it was so horrible to her she couldn't stand what she had done.

I raced back to my car. I was shaking. Went to work. Pushed the feelings I had for her, the pain I was feeling, the idea I wasn't worthy, buried them all deep down inside me.

I didn't call her. I never saw her again. Didn't return her calls. Didn't open her cards or letters.

All that time passed and the pain fades and we move on and I get an email...

A nice email from her. She's married to a great guy. She's got kids. She's got a great career. We're happy for each other then I find this happening:

She writes, "The last time I saw you, after we had such a beautiful time, the most horrible horrible thing happened to me, my mother died and then when I needed you most I couldn't find you and I never heard from you again."

I thought she was crying about me that morning, but she had checked her messages after I left for work and learned her mother died in a car crash.

Because of my insecurities some possibly great journey hit a detour. I crashed the car. I smothered a loving and giving heart.

I destroyed something good.

I finally got Rolf Pott's "Vagabonding" book and boy is it a winner!

Checkout his writing, ideas, and see if any of this can work in your life.

So far one of the things that stands out to me, even though I'm only 1 chapter in, is Rolf quoting a line from Charlie Sheen in Oliver Stone's "Wallstreet" where Sheen say's something like, "I wanna make a lot of money, cash in so I can spend a year riding a motorcycle across China." Or something like that...

The funny thing is, as Pott points out is; Why does he have to go through all that stuff when that goal would have been available to him anyway?

Travel can be cheap, I guess is part of what Pott's is saying.

I always think about Gump running across the country.

I think about Richard Farnsworth driving his lawnmower across those states to see his brother in David Lynch's "The Straight Story."

I think about Rudger Hauer hitchiking in, "The Hitcher."

Recently I purchased a nice, but cheap backpack and I've tried to put everything I think I'd need to have in my daily life to feel comfortable. However, I can't fit a shower in it, a toilet, or a car.

There sure a lot of Amish here!

I have nothing against them. Know little about them. They seem clean and nice to me.

They're every where here!

A guy I know here tells me they let the girls out for a year or so into the dirty world to see if she will stay with them or not. Then sometimes these girls go crazy with sex and stuff!

I've seen a couple like that. They will be dressed like fairly normal girls with t-shirts and jeans and they'll be hanging with their sisters and the sisters will be all decked out in Amishwear.

Another guy I met at FarmFest told me a joke that goes something like this (stop me if you've heard this before):

Amish Mother and Amish Daughter are riding in their horse drawn buggy in the cold Missouri morning air.

The daughter's hands are freezing.

"Mother, my hands are so cold, I can't feel them." she says.

"Daughter, take thee hands and place them between thee legs. Your legs will warm them."

She does and the warmth of her pale thighs warm her cold hands.

The next evening she is riding in another buggy with an Amish boy.

The boy says, "My, the air is so cold and my hands are so frozen, I can barely hold the reigns."

The Amish girl remembers what her mother taught her and says, "Why don't you put you hands between my legs and let my thighs warm them!"

He does and they are warm.

A few nights later they are riding in the buggy again.

"Oh my nose is so red and cold!" He says.

"I know! Why don't you put your nose between my legs?" She asks.

He places his nose between her legs and his nose is warmed.

The next night in the cold air she rides with him again.

"This air is so very cold, so cold in fact, I believe my penis is frozen stiff."

The next day the Daughter is riding in a buggy with her Mother.

"Mother, have you ever heard of a penis?" She asks.

The Mother shocked says, "Why yes daughter, why do you ask?"

The Daughter turns to her, "They sure to make a mess when you thaw them out, don't they?"

National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo) is about to start!

The idea is to get writers to write like there's no tomorrow for thirty days and if you got 50,000 words by midnight November 30, your name will be added to their list of winners and it'll all help raise money for children's libraries in Southeast Asia.

I've known some very talented writers who started and couldn't do it! And they are published full-time writers that do this for a living, that just couldn't pull it off!

I once dictated an 80,000 word book that I thought was pretty good being that I did it all in a nonstop 13 hour stretch. My throat was so sore. My eyes were blurry and red. My ass was so numb.

You should try it!

Haven't posted in new videos lately, but I've been shooting something almost everyday, just waiting to edit them all.

Haven't posted any new podcasts either, but I've been recording and finding old stuff I want to broadcast as soon as that's all edited.

I also believe I've found a cure for fighting Staphylococcus aureus, but just haven't got around to manufacturing the snake oil.

I got the time, I just need some energy, I'm wasting away.

My friend Steve sent me an email with a link to some amazing new house designs based on cheap materials.

There was one house built out of discarded pallets that looked awesome!

It I wasn't afraid of getting splinters and jabbed with a rusty nail, I'd build it! Those pallets are every where around here!

I think I'd have to cover it all up with a tarp or something because it's pretty airy looking.

I like the idea of making a house out of things you can find for free, I was looking around this area and wondering what was available and thought there sure is a lot of roadkill, maybe I could pile up the dead animals and make a dead animal dome, or something.

Renting the movie, "Seraphim Falls" a Western with Liam Neeson and there's one point in the film where Pierce Brosnan's horse dies on him in the desert while on the run and he "Empire Strikes Back" the horse, gutting it and climbs inside to hide from the posse. Yuck!

Everyone knows, I love the book, "The 4-Hour Workweek" I'm so into it!

There's some really great ideas in it about simplifying your live, getting a business that brings you money with little in the way of maintenance and living in a 3rd World Country where it's cheap and you can exploit the people working slave wages there... I'm all for that!

Lately, I've been doing my own version of, "The 4-Hour Workweek" but mine is like "The 4-Hours of Sleep Week."

There have been tornadoes, high winds and diarrhea!

I can't sleep with all this stress from nature!

Bought "Planet Terror" and I know it's silly, but I love this flick!

There's some strange dreamlike logic in all that mess that really works for me. I can't get anybody here to watch it.

I'm thinking I may not be Missouri material after all. People think I'm weird. People either ignore me or attack me. People here are pretty nice at first until they find out you just moved here from Califorication, then it's over!

There are a few here, a brave and shinning few that are cool, nice, sweet, smart, groovy, but I've only met a small few of them and being that I'm including myself in that count leaves only one other, but they just moved away.

Still reading the new book about Harold Robbins and there's some great stuff in there like his work with Jean-Luc Goddard and getting chicks pregnant while still married to another woman, oh and having book release parties where the most beautiful women in the world of the 1970's undress to the shock of others.

He still seemed so unhappy while all his wild adventures. He really hyped himself and built up false, exciting stories and legends about his life that I believe were too much and he felt he couldn't live up to and he began to feel hollow.

He had all these great lies down, but in the end all you have is debt and fiction. But then, I'm only half way through the book.

I've met some interesting people since being here in Missouri, but it's funny, ya know how people, no matter where you go are too busy living their lives and trying to pay their bills, there's so little time for you in their world.

I think about the tee vee shows like, "The Waltons" or "Little House on the Prairie" and they all seemed to make time on the porch, or out in the woods near a stream to chat and make friends.

I was listening to Buck Henry talk on a BBC documentary recently and he said, "I think TV is to blame for everything." I like him and think he may be right. I would include the internet and videogames, too.

No one has time to sit on the porch and tell stories any more.

Try sitting around a campfire and tell some little kids a ghost story and they're bored out of their sugar fried minds.

No one wants to take the time to get to know you unless they can immediately see something you have that they want. A while back a very smart older man that I knew told me if he were younger he would try to somehow get into selling drugs, because the drug dealers he knew had models and actress around him all the time. He had power over them. They needed him. They did what he wanted.

I have to find something in me that people will want.

I was just told there is a whole town founded by my family and they were among the 1st to arrive in America, were Sons of the Revolution and the Fathers of Industry!

You'd think I'd be able to get laid with that...

Not too many hot chicks care about history, I guess.

I just heard that one of my favorite people, Simon Pegg of the new, "How to Lose Friends and Alienate People," a comedy about Toby Young's life at Vanity Fair, "Hot Fuzz" and "Shaun of the Dead" is going to play Scotty in the new "Star Trek" film.

How cool is THAT!!?

Been on the hunt for the book by Julie Phillips, "James Tiptree, Jr: The Double Life of Alice B. Sheldon." I should have got it when I first saw it, but I let it go. I want a 1st edition hardback.

It's such a great story, her life!

Secrets, SciFi, CIA, Genre, Gender...

Sitting in Panera Bread in Springfield, waiting for my Acting Workshop to begin!

I got about 15 minutes before the crowd of acting hopefuls crowd the place and I'm a little nervous.

Stopped by Kinko's to print out some fliers and perforate those tear off info strips. I hope all this marketing works! There were a few people that were looking over my shoulder and asking me what it was all about while I was copying.

There always seems to be bands making fliers in these Kinko's, no matter what city.

I placed my notices at The Moxie Theatre, a couple of coffee shops, a few bookstores and a young girl asked me if I wanted her to post one in her sorority while I was taping one up next to the bathroom of a record store.

You never know who you might meet while your hustling...

Researcher says humans will wed robots!

Trends in robotics and shifting attitudes on marriage are likely to result in sophisticated robots that will eventually be seen as suitable marriage partners.

It's TRUE!!!

I'm so excited about this, cause I'm looking for a hot robot that will love me!

I was so sad to learn this news:

Screenwriter Charles Griffith, who wrote the screenplay for the original "Little Shop of Horrors" movie has died of a heart attack Sept. 28. He was 77.

Known for his work on low-budget horror films in the 60s and 70s with director Roger Corman.

Born in 1930, Chicago, met Corman in 1954, got his first feature writing credit on "It Conquered the World" in 1956, and worked with Roger Corman on more than a dozen other films, like, "The Wild Angels," starring Peter Fonda and "Eat My Dust," starring Ron Howard.

I just listened to Peter Bogdanovich's Saturday Morning Pictures and heard him and Corman talk about making "The Wild Angels," on BBC 4.

I then passed on this News about the show to my friend David who posted it on his site.

Weird how these things happen.

My friend Steve has found me a few cars, that he believes are a perfect match for me!

Aptera!

NmG/Sparrow!

And my Personal Favorite...

The Pivo 2!

What do you think?

Click here to check out
The Springfield Acting Meetup Group!

Check it OUT!!!

My Acting Workshop is up and running again! This time in Springfield, Missouri!

Okay Missouri Readers of this page, join up and Meet Up and let's make a MOVIE!!!

This coming Saturday, HURRY!!!

Spent $40 on a new membership to Sam's Club thinking it might make my life better.

The lady was telling me about the insurance they offer as she was taking my picture for the Photo ID on the card. I look sickly and very much in need of health insurance in the pic.

I bought nothing else, but the membership. The photo ruined my day.

Does Brad Pitt ever take a bad photo when he renews his Sam's Club Membership?

Got a flat on my car and went to Pep Boys where a beautiful woman helped me out by staying open until I could get a new tire. She was so cool! She knew all about cars, tools and had a great personality.

She asked all about me coming out here and asked things like, "Why?" She asked if I came alone or was seeing anyone. Then she said I should have no trouble meeting ladies as I was very handsome and had a great look. She actually said, "I love your look."

Stunned and flabbergasted I blurted out in desperation, "Well nigga write your number down!"

But she held up her hand to show me her ring.

Fuck!

Bought Andrew Wilson's "Harold Robbins: The Man Who Invented Sex" hoping to learn more about the guy who wrote books my mom read and who sold 750 million copies worldwide during his life.

So far it's great!

I'm only about 28 pages in, but I'm digging it!

I remember being a kid and getting all interested in Howard Hughes, after my mom telling me about the book, "The Carpetbaggers." She'd be reading by her favorite lamp, my dad would be snoring in his bedroom and I would see my mom getting all upset by some sex scene or the way some male character would act in one of Harold Robbins' stories, but she couldn't put the books down.

I was watching the TV while sitting in Ribcrib waiting for my awesome choice of the Old Smoky Sandwich Thingy... Don't know the name, but it's great!

Anyway, I see Cate Blanchett on the screen and I'm so in love with her and I'm excited to see her play Queen Elizabeth I, again in "Elizabeth: The Golden Age."

She won an Oscar as Katharine Hepburn, She played Galadriel in "The Lord of the Rings" and in, "I'm Not There," she's one of a group of actors playing Bob Dylan.

Now she's going to be in, "Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull."

She so ROCKS!!!

My brother Stan and I went to see, "3:10 to Yuma" and I really enjoyed it being that I once drove from Tijuana to the Salton Sea and on down through Yuma to meet a girl who was selling all her dad's old pulp Western books.

The farm labor organizer Cesar Chavez was born and spent much of his early life in Yuma and being that I am from Los Angeles, that means something to me. I wanted to find his birthplace but was unable to get directions from anyone I asked. I should have planned it better.

It was about 120 degrees and my A/C was doing nothing to lower the heat.

"3:10 to Yuma" seems to have been out a while, yet the theatre we were in was sold out, so it appears to be a very popular movie here.

Just slipped outside to look at the sky and watch the stars and make wishes on those that fell.

Sometimes, I get so down and things feel so bad to me, but when I stop and look up at the sky so Black and clear and deep and huge, I feel the pain slipping away and all my troubles feel so unimportant.

At Borders in Springfield, I picked up a copy of "Live Fast, Die Young: The Wild Ride of Making Rebel Without a Cause" by Lawrence Frascella and Al Weisel for $3.00 in their Bargin Bin!

I carried it around while listening to Bono sing The Beatles in the film "Across the Universe," the soundtrack was playing over the sound system of Borders.

I can't wait to see this film!

Just Listen!

Watched Terrence Malick's "The Thin Red Line" again today after finding the DVD at Walmart for $1.00!!!

I love this film!

Every time the soldiers are walking past the graves and the Sean Penn narration goes:

"If I never meet you in this life, let me feel the lack; a glance from your eyes, and my life will be yours."

I get choke up. I don't know why. But I do.

Not sure what I'm going to do this Month.

There are so many things I could do...

Time is flying by and it doesn't feel good to me. I'm getting older and older... FAST!

There doesn't seem to be enough time to get rich, or get to know people, or learn a new language, or go back to school, or meet a new woman and have babies, or go workout in a gym, or get plastic surgery, or learn to live in the moment...

Life appears so trivial to me and yet fragments of it are so magical.

Not sure what I'm going to do this Month, or the months after...