I guess it was Monday...

I failed to mention this at the time, but I was unable to sleep for two days. I was so exhausted all of Yesterday, that I went to sleep, or rather collapsed at something like 6PM.

As almost everyone who reads this daily knows, I like to make hypnosis mp3s and play them while I sleep. Someday I will market the best of my best tapes. They are really great and I have amazing lucid dreams. I had 12 hours of great dreams last night.

Someday I should write down the dreams I have because as great as they were, I have already forgotten them. Yet, I do know they were great dreams.

How do I know?

Well, I actually woke up happy!

When I wake up sore and grumpy I know it must have been a bad one.

When I wake up and my ass hurts I know Aliens have been probing me as they sometimes do while I sleep. Bastards!

When I get out of bed and step on empty Corona bottles I know they were Illigel Aliens. Bastards!

But Today I'm happy, cause I know I had good dreams!

And there wasn't even a wet spot in the bed.

Well, Sir Peter Ustinov, the British actor, author, funny guy, and playwright, who won two Oscars for "Spartacus" and "Topkapi," died of heart failure in Switzerland. He was 82.

I loved this guy!

There were some amazing stories about him during the making of "Spartacus."

When I heard about his death I had to pop in "Spartacus" just to watch his adlib about the shade of an umbrella that was missing him due to a bad slave, or was it a bad extra?

I started reading Agatha Christie as a kid because of his portrayal of detective Hercule Poirot in "Death on the Nile" and "Evil Under the Sun."

Yea, but Ustinov in "The Great Muppet Caper" was the best!

Okay, he's dead, get over it...

Go watch his movies and you'll see he lives on...

The coolest news I got Yesterday while setting up the Ray Harryhausen interview was that Jack Black has been cast with Naomi Watts in Peter Jackson's remake of "King Kong."

That truly rocks!

The O'Franken Factor!

Janeane Garofalo and The Majority Report, with co-host political humorist Sam Seder.

Lizz Winstead, Unfiltered, with rapper-activist Chuck D...

These are the new radio shows to be looking for...

A Romanian DJ seized a radio station and threatened to jump from a balcony if his employer cut the broadcast and told listeners he wanted his overdue salary.

I had to do that a few times myself.

Radio sucks!

I see that a Japanese firm has unveiled large robot for disaster rescue work...

I see a movie here...

With lots of Japs running for their lives!

I caught a bit of, 'The Practice" last night with William Shatner. It was the kick off to the new spin off with him and James Spader.

I have to say...

It was one of the best pieces of television writing I've seen in a long time.

Spader's speech in court was fucking awesome!

Shatner couldn't have been cooler!

Anyway...

I spent most of the day driving around Little Tokyo. It has changed some since I was last there.

I also drove to Cost Plus World Market looking for some Japanese decorations that I was unable to find in actual Japanese locations. And guess what?

Found none.

But I did buy a box of beers from around the World. You never know when you might need to enable an alcoholic in a bribe for some evil deeds.

I was listening to KPCC as they were talking with a lady named Nancy Pearl who wrote a book called, "Book Lust: Recommended Reading for Every Mood, Moment, and Reason" and about love of all sorts of books.

It was great and I can't wait to find that book.

I got an e-mail from a listener of my radio show named Galen who said I should find a book called, "Two O'Clock Eastern War Time" by John Dunning, as it's about old time radio and a mystery.

He then said he can tell from reading my pages that I would really enjoy it...

I wonder what he means by that?

Looks like I'll be shooting some video for a documentary on Ray Harryhausen. I'll also be using it as part of my radio show.

I love Ray!

I can't wait to see him again. He and my x-wife were always funny and sweet with each other when she was doing PR for the rerelease of "Earth vs. the Flying Saucers" and other projects with Uncle Ray.

There's a new book about him and I'll have more info about that soon.

I was going through stuff to take out to the trash, as I have been cleaning up the hole I live in...

I found some wonderful letters of everlasting love from my x-wife back when our momentary love was in fact ever lasting. They were sweet and nearly brought me to tears.

I don't know if I should hang on to these things and moments of time in my past...

I still have the cake knives use to cut our wedding cake... Do I really need to hang on to these things?

I've gotten rid of all our photos together.

If only "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind" brain stuff were really a possibility.

Or time travel...

Or me falling in love again...

Cleaned up around the place today and found lots of change scattered around on the floor.

It's like free money!

It was so hot because I was up on the top floor with a flat roof and no attic. I started taking clothes off bit by bit and ended up organizing in the nude.

All sweaty.

At one point I had some trash bags ready to take outside to the dumpster, unlocked the door, and then the breeze hit me and I realized I was butt naked!

I decided to turn all the plastic trashbags into bean bag chairs till I can get enough energy and clothes on to take them out.

Aaron called and he came over to pick me up and our friend Steve, an animator and creator of the world's most popular animation wesite, www.animationmeat.com.

We headed over to eat at Roman's in Studio City then over to see, "The Ladykillers" at Pacific Theatres, but after pigging out we all got kinda sleepy.

Yet we did not sleep.

We sat outside Starbucks and watched the endless parade of young tight belly shirts and floppy titties bounce past up as girls headed to their various destinations that didn't include any of us three.

We were in Tower Records looking at DVD's and at one point a young guy came over to where I was and started chatting me up about movies.

I first thought he must be talking to someone else, but after looking around realized he was talking to me.

He lightly brushed up against me and I had a very disturbing feeling wash over me like prickly heat.

I felt he was coming on to me.

He was young and very attractive, but what do I know?

I quickly moved away.

Yet sitting with the other two at our table outside, my mind wandered back to my brief encounter with the fresh twink.

I felt bad for walking away so suddenly.

Maybe he just wanted to be my friend. I have such a poor self image, I always think someone must want something from me other than friendship when they talk to me first.

Maybe he and I could have turned out to be good friends.

He was rather attractive.

I bet he gets lots of girls hitting on him. Maybe I could have picked up the ones he'd toss off.

You know Brad Pitt must have friends that get trim just from chicks trying to get closer to him.

What about George Clooney? Think Steve Soderberg got the hot piece of tail that he shacked up with because he knows where to aim his camera?

No.

Of course not.

I could be hanging with my new friend, laughing and having a great time getting girls.

Okay, so what if he's gay and wants to dip into my jeans? Maybe he has a mouth like warm honey...

That wouldn't make me gay if wanted to taste my steak. Besides, I'd be getting all those hot looking lil' girls that he'd ignore. I'd be thinking about them as his head was bobbing and blocking my view of the TV screen.

Oh let the guy have some fun. It'd be a small price to pay.

But then, could I really enjoy the kind of girl who would be thinking of him as I was doing my business with her?

No.

I'd be thinking about this dude slobbering all over my rocket and this bitch would be thinking how much better she'd be if she were with him...

It wouldn't be worth it!

I'd rather be with a girl who wasn't happy with me and I wasn't having a dude blow me.

Maybe it'd be best to not be with anyone...

I just wish I were pretty.

And could suck my own cock.

Without the backpain...

I wanted to do some fun stuff today, but I guess I got overwhelmed with all the possibilities.

I would list some of those possibilities, but there are just too many to mention here.

Actually, I really didn't have any plans.

Well, I got plans, but no desire to follow through with them.

I do have desire I guess, but lack of energy.

I went to a book signing for a few hours. It was rather dull. The subject was dull, but the speaker seemed captivating. Almost charismatic I dare say. He appears to have a cult following. I think he may be a professor, or something. There were young female ladies listening and smiling as he spoke.

I need to come up with a gig like that...

Speaking in front of young girls who will look up to me.

I imagine they'll look up at me because I will be standing up higher than them as they sit.

I could try and find some knowledge that these girls have none of but wish they did. They could come to me as I offer them what knowledge I have... But at what cost to them?

Sure it sounds fun.

It must be a lot of work though.

If it were easy I guess everyone would do it.

Maybe I could stand up on a stage and engage them with something other than knowledge... Maybe I could do magic tricks.

But that too requires skills I don't have.

Maybe I could find really stupid girls needing knowledge of things and skills I already have...

Maybe I could just pay some girls to look up to me.

But how do I get the money to pay them?

Man, I need a really high paying job.

I wish I had some marketable skills.

Yesterday I did a bit straight out of, "The Apprentice"...

My sister-in-law is a Girl Scout Troop Leader or whatever they're called. She sent me a huge box of various Girl Scout cookies.

Since I was on my Fast when I got them they sat in the fridge, but now that I'm off of it for now, I took a few bites.

They're good.

I was in the kitchen thinking about getting back on the Fast and giving the cookies away, but I found some cool pink cellophane and wrapped each cookie up nicely and then proceeded to go out and set them up on a table and sell them on the sidewalk.

I sold them all in less than thirty minutes and made $40.00 off a $3.00 box of cookies.

It was kind of fun.

But I really only did that after walking back from my visit to my friends at The Larchmont Pizzeria while they celebrated their 7th Anniversary.

I was walking along, staring at the ground thinking about my life and then suddenly I see a $20.00 bill blowing across the sidewalk in front of me.

WooHoo!

Pure profit!

I think that may be the biggest find I've had... It's usually pennies and nickles.

I was really excited about it. I started wondering how I could do that for a living... Just find money flying around.

There must be a way.

I was saddened by the news that Tom and Penelope have ended their relationship. Then I ate a cookie and felt better.

William Shatner is expected to join James Spader in the cast of producer David E. Kelley's spinoff to the canceled legal drama "The Practice." I was so excited about that I ate another cookie and felt much better.

I read that Comcast is buying TechTV for $300 Million. I hope Cat Schwartz get some of that.

I thought about her nude pics that a friend sent me. I thought about what kind of guy she might go for...

Then I put the cookies away.

If Comcast can't buy a mouse, they can buy a cat!

Today I must go out and sell something again...

Something that would impress Trump...

Hmmm...

Maybe one more cookie.

A cookie will help me think.

A cookie and a nap will do the trick.

And a slice of pizza.

Wait it's still early in the morning...

Damn, time is moving too slow...

At this rate, it might take a while to become a millionaire.

Everyone knows I use eBay almost daily to sell crap.

I've sold videos I've made and I've seen other bootleg videos and films I've made and sell them on eBay.

Vince Lozano posted an eBay auction during the American Film Market for the global rights to his film "Alvarez & Cruz," he thought he might be starting an electronic alternative for self-distribution of low-budget films. The winning bid went to Girl and a Gun Films.

Now, Lozano says, "the moral to the story is if you don't have the money don't make a bid."

"We didn't think we were getting fair offers from distributors," Lozano told indieWIRE via email. "So we decided to try something new." So they auctioned the global rights for a minimum $15,000 bid on eBay over three years after their festival debut... The film's budget was reported at around $28,000 to get the film in the can.

Check out the whole story @
indieWIRE.com

I read recently about a stop motion animator who had worked on some big Hollywood movies but decided to go back home to his little village in Europe and make his own short animated films without interference. He sells his DVD's on eBay and does well.

In a recent Fortune Magazine there was a millionaire who travels the world and collects meteorites and sells them on eBay.

I gotta get my eBay hat on and get my shit together.

If I could move away from Hollywood where my rent would be less... I could buy a nice house and make my small films and sell them on eBay.

Maybe meet a nice lady who might really dig me making films.

Maybe someone who thinks I'm artistic.

Maybe she could act in a few of them.

We would grow closer together. Have nice dinners outside on the patio, with candle light under the stars...

Maybe she could do a Lesbian scene with an actress I hired... If the part called for that. Course I'm writing the screenplay so who am I kidding, of course the script calls for that Lesbian scene.

Then I guess, do I really want to be involved with a girl that would do that in a film? I mean that's kind of slutty...

What if while I was directing she really got all into it and seemed to enjoy it with that other whore better than being with me?

The bitch!

I know what you're thinking... Maybe she's just a really good actress and had me fooled by her abilities...

Whatever.

Maybe I could just make little animated films and live alone.

Well, it's an end of an era...

Jack Valenti is to retire as head of the Motion Picture Association of America.

How will this news affect me?

Let me sleep on it and I'll get back with you.

The Supreme Court takes up 'under God' issue. Finally someone noticed that it violates Church and State, like so many other things.

I was so happy to discover that Yoanna became "America's Next Top Model". I knew it was her even though I told everyone else it would be Mercedes.

I'm feeling so Gay...

"The Shawshank Redemption" director Frank Darabont will write "Mission: Impossible 3," replacing Robert Towne, who penned the first two. Frank's a nice guy, but I hope he directs something soon.

I was cruising Blockbuster last night and found "Adaptation" for $6.99 in the previously viewed VHS section.

I love this movie and thought I might send it to my brother. But after I thought about it... I don't think they'll get it or even like it. I would somehow take that personally because I identify with that film so much.

Ever do that?

Feel for a movie so much and when someone else hates it, you just want to kill them and hide the body in a swamp?

Me too!

I need to get out of Hollywood. There's no swamps around here.

They have fake swamps.

But that's no good.

Oh well, maybe it's better if I try not to take things so personally when I have nothing to do with them in the first place. I should start seeing a Doctor again.

Or I could move to Florida where they have swamps.

Today was a long day of sending out mailings for a party.

I think it's about time I have one. I need one.

I was going to do my taxes. I instead thought of my upcoming birthday and decided I wanted a party.

Any party.

I need to clean my place up. This will force me.

I use to do that in the past. Have parties every weekend just so it would force me to clean.

I remember being a little kid and my mother and father were making real good money and my mother had a maid. My mother would hurry and clean the house before the maid arrived because if there was a mess mother would be embarrassed.

Maybe I'll have the party somewhere else.

Or maybe I'll get a maid.

A French maid.

I woke up at 3AM this morning after having made love to someone it seemed I've know before. It was so unexpected. I woke up after she told me she loved me. My heart ached. It was only a dream. It seemed so real.

The dream faded so fast I didn't even remember it until I was zoning out putting postage on my invites. Then it hit me that I had made love to someone in my sleep.

It was like she was sending me a smile from some room in my head that had been closed. Like piano music upstairs in a locked room. A sweet song. A lullaby.

I thought about her a lot today as I did my chores. I tried to remember her face and body, but no... She was just a whisper, a hint, a fragrance there, but moved away by a breeze before I could fill my lungs.

I walked through the sidewalk crowds of gray faces of people blurred by motion and lack of eye contact wondering if I had dreamed of her before, if she was someone in my past, someone who maybe once lived and is now spirit walking beside me through my boring life.

I held the mailings tight in my hand perched on the lip of the slide into the mailbox on the corner. I didn't want to send them.

I stared at them there tittering on the edge. Two people suddenly were behind me and I let the postcards fall in with a bang.

I turned to see the people were just passing and weren't even waiting to drop in their own mailings. I felt a huge regret.

I would have to figure out how to call all the people to cancel the party. I would need to come up with a lie. Maybe I would instead be killed in a traffic accident and they would understand why the party wouldn't happen.

My landlord would come in the apartment and wonder why my place was such a mess.

I could write a note and leave it laying there telling the maid that I need the place cleaned because I had been moving things around and that's why the house was in such disarray.

I don't have a maid, but maybe that lie would help people understand why the place was a mess.

I remember being in the third grade and Eddie Castleman brought a deck of cards with nude women on them. We were sitting out a softball game that we didn't get picked for and we were looking at these nekkid girls wondering how a guy could even play a game of poker without having to stop and whip out his weener and start jerking off...

That would surly disrupt the game.

Eddie told me he wanted me to take the deck home because his older brother said he was going to tell his mom that Eddie had them.

I accepted the deck.

I sat in my chair in class and it began to hit me as to how I was going to explain the deck if I got caught.

So I thought of a way...

I pulled out a sheet of paper and wrote:

"Eddie, I am so ashamed of you for having these disgusting pictures. I am taking these to the Principal and then telling my parents what you have done. I hope Jesus forgives you, Jerry"

I put this note with the deck just in case someone found them on me.

Bases covered.

What I didn't realize was that Eddie was only giving me the deck to frame me with them. He told the teacher after class and she approached me in the hallway.

I saw Eddie snickering with two other guys that hated me down the hall by the lockers.

I then handed over the deck with the note attached.

Then the joke was on him.

I was rewarded.

The teacher took me into an empty classroom after looking at the deck and photos. She asked me what I thought about the photos? What did I think the women in the photos were doing?

I was kind of scared.

She began undressing in front of me. She climbed up on the desk and got on all fours. She put her butt up in the air toward me and looked back at me.

I began crying.

I ran for the door but she had locked it.

She grabbed her yard stick and yelled at me, "Come here little man!"

She yanked me by the arm and spanked me hard.

She took my left hand and made me touch her breast.

I couldn't see because my eyes were filled with tears.

She then pushed my hand down her panties and I could feel her steel wool like hair.

Then there was a knock at the door and she quickly got her clothes on and answered the door.

It was the principal. They whispered stuff to each other and looked at me every once in a while.

The he left and she asked me not to tell anyone what had happened or she would get me in a lot of trouble.

I was so scared and I never told anyone about this.

There are other things I want to tell you, but "America's Next Top Model" is on right now...

Later...

I think maybe my metabolism has changed.

I also made some mp3's and did some writing on a novel I've had in my hard drive for a while.

I was so tired after hanging with Aaron that I was worried about falling asleep while he drove me home.

I guess I got my second and third wind.

I can either listen to the replay of Art Bell on KFI, or listen to Howard Stern live on KLSX...

Or iron my clothes and clean the bathroom...

Now if I only had some Fabreeze to spray on the carpet where my filthy stinking laundry molded in a pile for weeks and weeks.

That's it!

I'll get some shopping in, unless my local Ralphs is closed.

In that case I'll just download some early morning porn.

I think I came off the Fast too fast and started eating complex ingredients that my body can't process.

I believe I was suppose to be drinking chicken broth for at least a week before I started shoveling food in...

Oh well...

I came across some cool WWI Stereo Images that I want to scan and archive. I showed them to my friend Aaron Tonight because I knew he would be as enthusiastic as I was about them.

I'm not that great at scanning images and I haven't mastered the new scanner yet.

Aaron and I went to the Larchmont Pizzeria so we could see the new help they've hired. That place really has some cute but totally annoying girls working there, but at least they have personalities and that's fun hanging out listening to them rattle on...

We were going to see, "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind", but Aaron just saw that last night and I really didn't want to have him sit through it again even though he said he wanted to...

So we headed over to the Borders at Sunset and Vine. There are just too many books in the world that will never get read and will take up the space on the shelves that should be saved for books that need to be read, but won't...

Back over the hill in Studio City we visited Roman's to see Tanya and Michael and the rest of the staff freak because all the computer systems were down and they had to take orders by hand. It was Y2K at the restaurant...

Tanya asked me what was so different about me...? She noticed the weight loss. That was cool!

At home I had noticed my VCR had recorded Dr. Wayne Dyer's new "Intention" talk. I like to convert the audio to mp3 and play it on my iTunes to help me sleep. I just have to edit all the KCET Pledge Drive Crap out first.

Jesus Christ there are alot of crappy Bible movies coming out thanks to Mel Gibson and everyone jumping on the bandwagon...

I hope "Dawn of the Dead"'s box-office is so huge that they make a Jesus vs the Dead flick.

Hold on as I head to the keyboard to write that one down... Oh wait, I'm at the keyboard now. Well, I can't write it while I'm writing this crap.

I guess I'll have to wait to accept that big check from Hollywood some other time.

Today I was over by the Cinerama Dome, or Arclight... Whatever it is and I saw a bunch of people dressed like zombies and then...

I realized, "Dawn of the Dead" was playing there, but that wasn't it...

According to an employee at the Staples where I was buying a new scanner, It was a War Protest going on near by...

They just looked like zombies I guess.

I met one of the stars of one of my favorite movies...

Remember, "High Fidelity"?

Okay was it Jack Black that I met?

Was it John Cusack?

Was it Tim Robbin?

No it was... TODD LOUISO!!!

Remember him?

Yea, he was great. He told me he directed a movie starring Philip Seymour Hoffman called, "Love Liza" but I haven't seen that one.

He was really a cool guy.

There. What'd you do Today?

Well it's Friday and really, what does that mean to me?

Nuthin'...

Just another Gawddamn day to wade through trying to make it to the next border, the next Holy Land, the next spark of happiness...

I saw the headline:

Morgan Freeman to Drive Indy Pace Car

Did you wonder about Jessica Tandy as I did?

J.J. Jackson, Original MTV VJ, Dies

I remember watching him when I was a kid, thinking he was my least favorite, but years later I met him at a party and found him really cool and sweet.

Donald Trump seeks to copyright "You're Fired" catchphrase

That means you can sue your boss if he infrindges on Trumps trademark.

Actor Paul Reubens Pleads Guilty in Obscenity Case

It's hard to believe isn't it?

Red Lobster to Trim All-You-Can-Eat Deals

Think this might all be traced to the FCC, Janet Jackson, and Howard Stern?

I want to eat there now, just because they're taking it all away.

Actually I am ready to eat anywhere.

Just this afternoon I was contacted by a goalie for Waner Bros. Studios wanting ME to recommend a Horror author to them for possibly mining for the next wave of Horror films...

I of course told them about my late friend Richard Laymon.

The lady on the phone got all excited.

Now that Dean Koontz is handling Richard's estate...

I hope Warners' ready for some fun dealing with Dean.

Happy Day After St. Patty's...

I hope you're not feeling too much like shit.

Nice they put it in a middle of a work week isn't it?

Mercedes McCambridge is now dead...

I loved her!

I thought about having a drink to her, but not sure how that would affect my Fast.

I have many tapes of her radio work and some film work.

She played Linda Blair's demonic voice in "The Exorcist".

She died of natural causes March 2 in San Diego at the age of 87.

She was Oscar-nominated for her supporting role as Rock Hudson's tough, possibly Lesbian, but cool Texan sis in Giant.

She became a regular on the "I Love a Mystery" series and worked often with Orson Welles' Mercury Theater.

Welles called her "the world's greatest living radio actress."

She was great in Welles' "Touch of Evil", as a leather gang leader.

She eventually retired to La Jolla, where she died in a nursing home.

Makes me wish I would have done more research and gone to visit her.

Imagine the stories she could tell.

Hell, here's a Master Cleanser Cocktail to you, Mercedes!

Next month, I'll have a Vodka for ya!

Again with the horrible dreams.

I thought the lack of food would help, but I guessed wrong.

I bet I really made a lot of noise while fighting off Demons in my sleep.

I remember the one that really made me sit up in bed. I walked down the hallway to the bedroom door and slowly opened it knowing that someone was on the other side. I pulled the door toward me and in sparks of electrical arcs I saw myself standing before me.

I don't know why now telling this... It isn't scary? But man, I jumped right out of my loose skin.

Maybe someone will explain it for me.

I stopped by the Burbank Library this weekend and picked up a couple of free DVD's.

One was a doc about Samuel Goldwyn that I had already seen, but watched again...

The other was one I didn't see in the theatres because almost everyone told me it was horrible. So what happens?

I loved it.

It was Steve Soderberg's, "Solaris" and I really dug it.

I must have been in the right mood for it.

Jeremy Davies does one hell of a job in that flick.

I just read about this documentary, "The Good Old Naughty Days" whose story begins in the attic room of a very respectable family in Paris, so respectable that the family have remained anonymous for fear of scandal being attached to their good name.

After the death of the patriarch, relatives discovered a stash of 30 one-reel dirty movies, dating back to the turn of the century, hidden in a secret cupboard in his study. None of the family had known about the existence of these films, which were hurriedly turned over to the National Film Archive.

The films have very little in common with conventional pornography and a lot to do with the frank but double-sided attitude towards sexuality in early 20th-century France.

One of the films, "The Musketeer's Dinner", features a French infantryman who has a meal in an outdoor restaurant before two waitresses decide to make his lunch a highly memorable one.

It was made during the filming of a 1920 film, The Three Musketeers, in the Paris suburb of Redon, and its happy star would have been a jobbing electrician or a cameraman taking advantage of his boss's day off.

In the UK the film will be released with an R-18 certificate, the designation hitherto confined to hardcore porn only available in licensed sex shops.

This is the first time for over a decade that this sort of film has been given a mainstream cinema release.

But the chief concern at early screenings here was over the welfare of a dog that provides a service to a lady of dubious moral fiber.

"We had a screening at the Chelsea Arts Club in London," says the who put the films together.

"Two women were very upset about the dog, and they kept asking if it was harmed in any way. I told them that as far as I could tell that little dog was very happy. Thank God I took out the scene with the duck."

"The Good Old Naughty Days" is out in London on March 26, I don't know about you, but I'm flying over for it.

"Eternal Sunshine" (the title comes from an Alexander Pope poem, he was one of the greatest poets of Enlightenment)

"How happy is the blameless Vestal's lot! ... Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind! Each pray'r accepted, and each wish resign?d."

Remember?

Elijah Wood talked with Rings writers Fran Walsh and Philippa Boyens about returning to New Zealand to snag a small part in director Peter Jackson's upcoming King Kong remake while promoting his next film, "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind."

Kate Winslet, will star in the upcoming J.M. Barrie's "Neverland," playing the woman behind the man who created Peter Pan.

"Neverland" is directed by Marc Forster, who directed "Monster's Ball."

No word on who Michael Jackson will play.

Day 16 of my Fast and I'm doing good but I don't think I want to go for 44 days like David Blaine. I am very weak and tired.

I've lost lots of weight, but I still have loose skin and a pouch on my belly. I need to do sit ups but can barely get up out of my plastic box.

Or even my bed.

Boy, I'm bored...

Ya never realize how much of your life is planned around eating until you stop.

My reading has dropped too, because I did all mine on the toilet.

Day 13 of my fading away period.

I'm living a "Thinner" scenario. It's like, "Leaving Las Vegas" with Cayeene Pepper and Lemon Juice instead of the hard stuff.

I talked with my brother, he wants to do now, but I doubt he'll make it because his wife is a good cook and if he were to stop eating her vittles she might feel neglected. It happens.

Fasting is best left to those divorced, lonely, depressed, and or suicidal.

I had a conversation with my friend Allen today about all the "Outsourcing" going to India and was thinking that's the place to move if you want a job. Also think of all the great Indian food you could get. I'd hire a house boy, watch Merchant/Ivory films all day, eat stuff with curry...

It'd be great!

Day 12 of my Fast and things just couldn't be better...

I was talking with my neighbor Kristin about why I would do this and I told her how great it was to be "in control" rather than having food control me. I realized that the other night when I walked in to a McDonalds just to smell the fries and burgers.

I did this at first just to torture myself and because I heard that The Artist Formerly Know as Prince does it too.

Man it did smell good, but I had no strong desire to eat anything and that was a great feeling. I don't drink coffee, but walking past a Starbucks the aroma was so amazing. My senses are so powerful now.

I also can see through walls and clothing, but yet not lead, or other really dense metals.

Also while walking around Melrose, Larchmont Village or even Rodeo Drive, I've noticed people looking at me differently. I thought only those that know me would notice the difference, but others seem to take a second look.

That maybe because I'm wearing a belly shirt, but I thought, hey, if you got it...

I recently mentioned that I have never been ask to join a secret society and I was told that it may be my inability to keep secrets.

But knowing those that appear to be members of such societies and clubs...

Maybe I should be glad.

A Masonic initiation ritual ended in tragedy when a man was shot in the head and killed with a gun thought to contain blanks.

I've been accused of that before...

47-year-old William James was accidentally killed when Albert Eid, 76, confused a loaded .38-caliber semiautomatic pistol with another gun during the induction ceremony in Long Island.

Guns don't kill people. People... Wha?

Who knew shooting, or rather getting shot was part of membership.

How cool would it be if that was how you join the NRA?

What do those in, "The Fellowship" have to do to get in?

Well the future is finally here...

A new household robot soon on sale in South Korea.
And the three-wheeled gizmo wheels around the house with its motion sensors and heat detectors, snapping shots of anything that moves and keeping a lookout for fires and gas leaks.

A robotic Humvee... Slightly more expensive... Became the first entry to finish a qualifying run for a $1 million race across the Mojave Desert by teams trying to develop the next generation of military combat vehicles.

Carnegie Mellon University's red Humvee won before it was torched by an environmental terrorist group.

A French teenager fell nearly 13 feet from the top of a parking garage which he and his friends had climbed in order to take photographs of each others' asses. He suffered fractures to his wrists, knees and pelvis.

They had just watched on the US television show "Jackass".

The French New Wave? They are so dated. I hope they get Nick at Nite in France.

Day 11 of my Fast and man oh man is it changing my life.

I haven't had a bowl movement in days. I'm saving so much in baby wipes.

It's funny how girls I know will say to me, "Jerry? You've lost so much weight."

But guys I know, will say, "Oh I didn't even notice."

Then the girls say, "You look so good. I hope everything hasn't gotten smaller."

Then the Colored girls go, "Doo da doo doo doo doo da doo.."

Whatever...

Jack White pleads guilty...

I knew he was bad.

Poor Renee. Poor Meg. Poor Holly.

Paul Winfield dies. That's sad. He was great in, "The Terminator" and in, "Star Trek: The Wrath of Khan."

Day Ten of my Fast! Yeah!

My friend Paul brought me a book he's know I've always been looking for... Two books actually, "The Mind Control of Candy Jones" and a book about Long John Nebel that I read and enjoyed and now must own.

I had a dream about making a video and in the video and in the dream I made a contraption that held the camera stationary in a box that contained a group of candles and by moving the box I could make the flames dance to music.

It was so beautiful.

Until I woke up and tried making it happen.

I got splinters and wax all over my hands.

I read a story about an animator who had tired of working with Hollywood and began making the films he wanted to all by himself in his home in the country and selling his own DVD's on the web.

That sounded like a good happy and lonely story.

I could dig a life like that...

I met a guy named Wayne today who works as General Manager of a motion picture equipment rental house in Hollywood and I told him about my years of experience working at one in Dallas, Texas. We shared some stories and thoughts about the future of movie making with film, now that Digital is so popular and cheap.

In a way, I'll miss those old sprocket holes.

Harvey Pekar, the inspiration for the film "American Splendor," is to write three graphic novels for Ballantine Books. This is great! Now he can write about the affects of the movie, then about the affects of getting the book deal, and then about not getting a new movie deal for the three new books.

I know so many people who know of him only through the movie and now they can't find his books anywhere.

I just woke up from another of my horrifying dreams about Earthquakes. In this one, I'm in my car and I'm driving and I see some water running across the road.

I'm on what appears to be the 101.

The water is shallow so I drive through it. However, under the water the road has given way and the car falls into a hole onto its side. Water rushes in on me and as I climb out the window, I see the mountains falling, the overpass buckling and a Ryan Seacrest billboard crushing a schoolbus as it topples over onto it.

I wake up in a panic as usual.

I must be troubled about something.

Maybe it's Ryan Seacrest.

I keep writing about it incase it's a premonition. Like I have psychic powers or something...

I wish I did. Then I'd know ahead of schedule whether I was going to have a good dream or not, then decide if I should sleep or stay up and watch infomercials.

I'm a huge David Mammet fan and I can't wait to see, "Spartan". He wrote on of the best books on directing that I've ever read.

I'm also a huge David Koepp fan. He made "Apartment Zero" and some huge ass blockbusters you probably never heard of...the guy rocks. Also his uncle was actor Claude Akins, one of my favorite actors. I'm looking forward to seeing, "Secret Window" even if the trailers for it kinda suck.

I told my friend Aaron I was looking forward to seeing it because he wrote, "Terminal Velocity" but later I remembered it was David Twohy. Atleast I think it was...

Or maybe that's what the Government wants me to think.

It was a tough toss up to see what to watch on the tube while I should have been doing something else, but since I'm great at multi-tasking useless things...

Therefor I watched, "Behind the Camera: The Unauthorized Story of Charlie's Angels", then flipped to see a total of three seconds of, "Judas", but because of the racist treatment of Romans I switched to watch Dr. Wayne Dyer on KCET talk about how to use intention to get what you want.

I tried Intention, but all I got was a rock.

I love him. You should read his stuff and not skim it like I do.

I intent to read his stuff more intently.

The Ninth Day of my Fast and no tape worm shooting out my ass yet.

That's good right?

I mean, that probably says that I don't have one.

Unless I have a really healthy and strong tape worm that is hanging on for dear life.

My friend Aaron sent me this link to help me understand the complexity of my colon intake and exhaust system.

It's been very helpful to me in this period of weak energy.

I talked with my brother last night about his wife who is a Troop Leader for Girl Scouts in a very small town. I ordered about four boxes of Chocolate Peppermint and Peanut Butter and Chocolate cookies to help her out.

I thought I could freeze them until I'm off the Fast.

He told me they have raked in $7000.00 for cookies!

Wow"

I had no idea that Girl Scouts were such good sales people.

I'm thinking of baking some cookies and hiring some girls to sell them for me.

I was thinking of an angle that I could use... The girls could have sad faces like those old paintings of sad clowns and poor hungry kids in alleyways that my mother had hanging on the walls of my bedroom when I was a deeply disturbed child.

I would call the little girls...

Are you ready for genius?

"Girl Pouts!" ...get it?

Thanks, I appreciate that.

I need to find a designer to design something for the girls to wear as a uniform. Maybe they can dress like Meg White.

Well, Spalding Gray's body washed ashore on the East River.

It makes me sad. I popped in my tape of "Swimming to Cambodia" and watched a few choice bits today.

I received an e-mail from a Woman in LA, as that is how she signed it, who also is Fasting and had stumbled onto my blog.

A Chinese herbalist says he will fast for 49 days in a bid to beat the 44-day record set last year by US magician David Blaine, who achieved the feat suspended above London's River Thames in a glass box.

My goal is just to the end of this month. How many days in this month?

Damn, is time crawling by...

I also got a very vague e-mail from a woman named Sarah asking me how I was doing...

I didn't know who she was, but today in a follow up e-mail she reminded me. She was a woman from a past relationship. Something like 15 years ago.

I think I may have mentioned her recently, but had forgotten her name. Funny how time smooth things out like tracks in sand in wind.

I was just watching Johnny Depp on 20/20 and it really hits me that he's the coolest guy there is...

There was a shot of him living in France that really made me wonder what I'm doing here in Hollywood. He's sitting at a table at a Cafe drinking wine and eating cheese and bread...

And I thought I should be there eating cheese and bread and drinking wine.

But it may be the Fast talking.

I can't wait for this Fast to be over and then I'll have some French Fries.

Okay...

I saw S&H.

"Starsky and Hutch" as the kids are now calling it. It was okay, but I didn't have as many laughs escaping me as I did watching, "Old School."

I wanted to see, "The Passion..." first and then sneak in to S&H to see if I felt any prejudice against Ben Stiller, but Aaron was with me and he just didn't want anything to do with The Jesus.

I bet we would have had more laughs, but...

Whatever.

Today was hot!

I actually woke up with no covers and I was sweating. I thought at first I was having a fever. The last few days have been so nice, then this temperature shoots up. I dread the coming heat of Summer.

I need to find a place to move to that is cooler.

Aaron said he noticed my weight loss. That's good because this Fast is now in its Seventh day and it would suck if I was changing my appearance.

I've been so good with water and my own special Master Blaster drinks. I actually sat with Aaron in Fuddrucker's and watched him eat a chicken breast that looked like a slab of steak, breaded shrimp, and some onion rings. It looked and smelled so fucking good I was ready to stop my heart right then and there.

But I'm a good boy.

I heard John Henry Williams died. Ya know, Ted Williams son. I wonder if anyone has frozen his head yet?

I was watching some footage of a recent fashion show and I thought that the models and what they were wearing looked familiar. Then as I read the scrawl at the bottom of the screen it all made sense. Marc Jacobs' collection for Louis Vuitton is inspired by White Stripes drummer Meg White.

Now you too can dress like Meg.

Up again early with spastic sleeplessness.

I turn on the tube to watch Ebert and Roper mention Charlie Kaufman and Michel Gondry's, "Eternal Sunshine of the Eternal Mind" and how they both are happy that Charlie is still writing even after the unfortunate death of his brother Donald.

How cool is that that they keep it going?

Today is Saturday so what should I do?

I could go to Amoeba and pick up some used DVD's that I've been thinking about...

I thinking of grabbing some old Edgar G. Ulmer films and maybe see if I can pick up the Kubrick documentary, "Life in Pictures."

I could go see Starsky and Hutch.

Or get a Smog Check on my Honda.

Sometimes the endless choices are overwhelming.

I might need to consult my Magic 8 Ball.

My Fast is going really well, however I'm loosing size everywhere but where I want to...

The really weird part is my sunglasses slid on so easy, so that means my head has actually shrunk in size.

I find myself troubled by Martha's guilt situation and possible prison time. I believe she's probably guilty of this and many other things, but isn't it amazing the whole Dick Chenney and his friends at Enron are still out on the streets.

I was daydreaming about Martha in prison.

This daydream actually continued off into the night while I was in bed hoping to fall asleep, but then I started picturing her as the head lesbian breaking in all the new girls in her cell. The shower scenes were very decorative with ferns and candles.

I almost popped, but due to my current Fasting my penis just dry coughed.

Less mess...

Another night of no sleeping...

This is the Fifth Day of my new Fast. My goal is the entire month. I believe I will see Jesus, or atleast the movie, "The Passion of the Christ."

Or maybe I'll just finally see the "...Return of the King."

My friend Ruben asked me why I would do this Fast? I told him that I do it every so often just for fun. I also believe it adds life. Scientists are always starving rats and mice and they seem to live longer.

I like my Fast, "Supersized!"

I was just flipping back and forth between Howard Stern's announcement that these are his last days on the radio and George Noory talking with Professor Paul Davies an astrobiologist based in Australia, about how the Universe works.

It seems, sometimes it doesn't.

Or are we just throwing monkey wrenches into Black Holes?

Life is just too confusing for me. There seems no right answers, no true right angles, just the Conservative Right...

And Secret Societies...

And none of them want to choose me as a member it seems.

I know for a fact that my body is now digesting itself. Fat that I have had stored is now being used. Food I ate years ago and became fatty tissue hold a memory that my stomach is now moving through like an old family album.

I remember vividly, bad dinner dates, bad restaurants, and near botulism.

But I remember the good times too...

No I don't.

That's just the Fast talking.

Time to drink more water.

...And pee.

Again.

Then...

Repeat.

Boy, I've been in a real sad mood.

Down in the dumps in a bad way.

I just sat up in bed early this morning, tired of tossing and turning, and just stared off into space.

I had one of those sinking feelings that I get sometimes that I'm standing on the edge of an abyss and the ground is sliding away.

I started thinking how great it would be to run away and just travel, but who can afford that? Even if you did a Forrest Gump and just traveled by foot, coast to coast, eating on the road is expensive... Unless you go the roadkill route.

I really need to have something to look forward to, but can't think of anything, or even create anything to plan ahead for...

I use to hear about planning one thing a day to make getting out of bed worthwhile, but I haven't come up with much and I'm so worn out just thinking up things that I get exhausted.

I find myself reading alot about writers and their lifestyles, in their cottage in Ireland, with a nice sod fire in the fireplace, sheep pressing their noses up against the window, a bit of brandy next to the laptop...

Then I start wondering if I'd be able to an Internet connection?

I know that I'd like to meet new people outside of Hollywood and Los Angeles. I feel let down by people. I feel let down by me. I feel let down by the hopes and dreams one gets by seeing a TV show like "Friends" and how great and witty everyone is... And you just can find that in real life.

I can't anyway.

America is a hard and scary place right now for me.

How can a kid ever dream of one day being the CEO of a large corporation without fear of having 43% of shareholders wanting to kick you out?

What about the kid that truly believes America is a free market and becomes a famous talkshow host that finds the Government doing everything it can to censor and silence you for your political views?

Aim low kids!

You just might hit what you're aiming for...

Unless you want to be scanning bananas at Ralphs...

They'll find a way to take that away from you too...

Access to my website was down on and off Yesterday, so I was unable to post any messages telling just how dull it was in my life.

I talked with an old friend name Paul about taking some video I shot along time ago of interviews with people involved in the study of Secret Societies and witnesses to paranormal activities in California, and slapping them together in a DVD that he would help market.

He's really tied into that scene and knows what is interesting to buyers and those that are obsessed with such Fortean subjects.

Might be fun to do some of these DVD's.

I was listening to George Noory last night while soaking in a hot candle lit bath... Romantic isn't it?

He told an interesting story... A mother of a 6-year-old girl thought her daughter was to have died in a fire as an infant, but found her alive by chance at a birthday party in Philadelphia two months ago. The girl was being raised by a woman who may have set the blaze and abducted the baby.

How weird would that be?

Godzilla will walk off into the sunset as far as the Big Screen is concerned. "Final Wars" is the 50th anniversary of his movie debut.

In this flick, Godzilla will be part of an ensemble of more than 10 popular monsters that appeared in past movies.

Think of it as Godzilla directed by Robert Altman...

Okay, don't think of it like that...

But just how cool would that be? Elliot Gould battling Godzilla...

I know it's late... Or is it early?

I just got back from hanging out with my old friends Josh and Derrin who were still in town after attending the Independent Spirit Awards.

They wanted me to show them the bar scene since they said they had been reading about my binges of Mandarin Cosmopolitans.

I told them on the phone that I wasn't sure that anything would be open on a Sunday Night.

There was dead silence on the phone.

Then they began screaming that it was, "Oscar Night!"

My Honda hauled my tired and fat ass over the hill into Hollywood, then over into West Hollywood to the Le Montrose Hotel.

I haven't seen them in a while and they both have many cool film projects they have worked on, are working on and are trying to promote.

They both looked dead tired, but wanted to go out and drink.

I figured they wanted to see some Stars, some Oscars, some action...

They pulled out a film they worked on called, "Vera", I think that was the name. It was made in Mexico and is so trippy looking that I wanted to see the rest of it.

They pulled out some trailers for a couple of concepts they are trying to sell that looked kind a good... But needed some work.

I sat on the edge of a bed and they pulled out all the posters and stills from their stuff and I realized we weren't leaving Le Montrose.

We walked down to the Restaurant and ordered club sandwiches, yet I noticed it was the 1st of the month and had made a promise to myself to start a new Fast. So I watched them eat.

There was a party on the roof by the pool we walked around and I saw lots of snobby people.

I was of course dressed horribly.

Josh tried ordering me a Mandarin Cosmo, but was only able to get me a Vodka with something fruity in it. It was okay, but I never found out what fruity thing was in it.

They told me about their adventures at the AFM, Sundance, and shooting in Mexico... Then the stories of how our friends seem to be doing better than us.

They're doing better than me.

Derrin has a little brother that has been shipped to Haiti and he was worried about that situation. I didn't even know we were sending soldiers to Haiti.

I seemed so out of it to him.

He told me how he used to think I was so political back in the day and how maybe Hollywood has drained me.

I've been drained, but by what I'm not sure I told him.

He told me how he remembers how I use to have four or five projects going on all the time. How it was "Me" that would be getting Oscars...

I began to feel really uncomfortable, he had been drinking and I felt something bad was coming.

It did.

He told me how I was a loser and I'm wasting my life and I look so pathetic writing that (This one...) stupid webpage putting all my personal thoughts out there for people to laugh at...

"How can anyone ever take you seriously?" he screamed.

Josh came over from talking with a really pretty girl and her sister in from London to see someone named Joss Stone. Whoever that is. I guess I'm suppose to know.

Josh started patting Derrin on the back trying to calm him down.

I finished my drink and with knees knocking and all wobbly I quickly left without saying goodbye.

I walked and walked as I had to park quite a ways away. I finally just sat in my car shaking as it was cold and I have to admit was hurt by what had happened.

I thought about how time has really flown by without me actually producing anything good. I thought about time in general.

Time...

I turned on the radio and Art Bell was on KFI and the first thing I heard him say was something like, "By this time in our lives, weren't we suppose to have robots doing all the work for us?"

Time has let us down.

I began wishing I was a robot, or atleast could switch on the robot in me to take over and do whatever needs to be done to live the life worth living.

A robot would never let things people say to them get them all upset and sad.

A robot would never think of itself as a "Loser."

A robot would make the perfect Oscar speech and he'd never be cut off by the music because he would have perfect timing.

I wish I were a robot.