I've been getting some good e-mail lately, please keep it up!

I have received a few female e-mails from ladies who have clicked on link on the left in an attempt to hook me up with their friends or relatives.

This is pretty nice! I hope this continues, however I may seem picky, but I just wouldn't want to waste anyone's time.

So far the majority of the women who seem interested in dating me are either in their late teens or early 20s. That is very sweet! It may mean that I seem immature. Or the demographics for this web site are skewed to a younger crowd, more so than I imagined.

I don't mean to sound cruel, or prudish, but I find it hard to date a girl whose mom is younger than me. That's just the way I roll...

I also received a couple of letters from girlfriends of women I supposedly dated in the past. In one e-mail the girl told me she was at one time best friends with the woman I went out with, but she did not like the way her friend treated me behind my back. She said, "I would hear her talking to you on the phone so sweetly, then after you got off she would call and talk to 2 or 3 other guys. It's good that you got out while you did, because she even screwed me around."

I don't even remember who she's talking about, but I guess I'm lucky. She went on to suggest maybe we could meet. I hope it's not one of those situations where there is the hot girl and the fat friend and I was dating the hot girl. But really, who cares? Like I can afford to be choosy.

I was thinking the other day, about when I was younger, there seemed to be an inordinate amount of TV shows about ugly girls getting cosmetic surgery and becoming the talk of the town. Do you remember those shows?

I remember a story about the ugly girl in school being involved in some sort of accident and getting a complete makeover to become the hot babe on campus. I used to love those stories!

Maybe I loved them so much, because I was dating the nerdy, artsy, klutzy, smart Girls and I was hoping that they would get in some sort of accident, get cosmetic surgery, become like a younger version of Kelly LeBrock in the movie "Weird Science," and that she'd be mine forever because I had been so kind to her when the other kids in school were making fun of her.

But that is a crazy fantasy! Because once they become hot, they always dump you for the jock!

That's why it's best if the accident they are involved in, causes some sort of blindness. Then they can't see how sexy the jock is, or how ugly you are.

I think that's why I used to be attracted to handicapped girls, but you know, the hot handicapped girls. I used to fantasize about dating a girl in a wheelchair that looked not unlike the actress Phoebe Cates. She would be paralyzed, but she would still have feeling in her vagina, so maybe she was only paralyzed from say, the knees down. Just enough so she couldn't walk away from me.

One time, when I wasted some money on E-Harmony, I was hooked up, after months of going back and forth with stupid qualifying messages, with an extremely attractive girl in a wheelchair. I thought my dreams had come true. We liked the same movies. We read the same books. We did the same amount of exercise. But once she met me, she informed me she would like a guy with hair.

I was so hurt.

I thought to myself that I should tell her, "Yeah? Well, I bet you would like to walk too." It was like she should lower her standards because she tripped down some stairs.

I was so hurt. Rejected by a chick on wheels.

For months afterwards, I illegally parked in any handicapped parking spot I felt I could get away with.