Hey, that Donald Trump show may be the greatest TV show ever invented since the creation of Paris Hilton's show...

What's it called...?

"The Apprentice"?

Awesome!I'm thinking this might be required watching in Business School and Lemonade Stand Seminars. I loved it! I normally don't get excited by reality tee vee, or reality itself, but there was something kinda cool and painful about this one.

I remember being quite the hustler as a young dude. I had a balloon business, made fish and tackle, manufactured battery chargers, made commercials for local businesses, made personalized animated cartoons in the corner of textbooks for fellow students at a buck a show, and made deserts for restaurants in my spare time.

Now?

I don't do squat!

Lazy bastard!

I have been putting my mind to something though that I know will break big! When I release this idea, it will spread like a mind virus. I'm thinking I'll have to come up with a way to make a good living doing absolutely nuthin' and getting paid to do it.

I'm writing the book now about that and as soon as I finish it I'll let you know. However, writing is real work, so I'm looking into having someone else do it for me... Also, I need someone to actually think up the idea for me... But I got the paper when they need to write it down!

The AVN Awards are taking place in Vegas this weekend... That's The Adult Video Awards to you! That's the porno award thing to the layman.

I'm still feeling ill, but I've been booked and all paid for, and have shooting and interviews to do there at the Venetian... I guess I won't be the only one spreading a virus there.

I've already been asked several times to share my suite. A couple of Fetish model friends and two girls from a porno-dorm need to crash at my space. This really troubles me as I fear my snoring and nocturnal gas emission will only lead to my embarrassment. Tyler, a USC porno student and skateboard spokesmodel told me not to worry about all that, she said, "You should see half the people I have to perform with..."

Somehow it all still troubles me. I get too worried about having my free space and having to share with people after working so hard.

Tyler's friend is a massage therapist and she's coming along this their group just to do massages for dealers that will be on their feet all day. Tyler already said she would give me a free massage in exchange for the girls crashing in my room. That sounds great and all but, I really need to get a good back waxing before I feel comfortable having a masseuse getting her hands and fingers tangled in my back hair safari.

Now if Tyler had a waxer coming with her...

I've been told there will be plenty of last minute waxing going on there, so I guess I shouldn't worry.

Yet, I'm still really feeling under the weather. I might have to pass.

This is going to be a very hard choice to make:

Porno chicks sleeping next to me in my suite?

Or...

Stay home and wallow in my mucus and freebase Nyquil?

YOU MAKE THE CALL!!!