Hey don't know if you remember the Fetish model that once responded to my Personals Ad, well I finally met her in person. I made sure that we met in a public place. I made sure to wash in all the stinky places. I made sure that I carried a gun.

We met at Star Wok, I woulda met her at Frontier Wok, but I had been there earlier in the day. They seemed please that I had a meal with a woman after so many dinners with my friend Aaron. After my divorce and spending so much time with Aaron, I think there were some questions bouncing around in the minds of the Chinese.

It was kinda funny. Aaron actually walked in while I was eating with this lady. I believe this gal thought it was all planned, but she just has no idea how dull our lives are... My life anyway. Aaron was there to see the waitress as always.

It was interesting cause I was still tripping from my Effexor Flashbacks and my dropping caffeine off my diet and I somehow ended the dinner by checking for a lump on this models chest in the parking lot. The lump was actually under her arm, but I have large hands and a depth perception problem, so I may have made contact with her extremely large breast. Well, she has two large breasts, but I only feel part of one and a lump. Repeatedly.

I only say this cause I've taken classes on breast detection and directed a breast examination video, so I'm sort of an expert. If you or some other models you know need to be checked...

I just read singer Anastacia Battling Breast Cancer, see if she had called me earlier... People you gotta go get checked, can't mess around with this. I need to get my prostate checked come to think of it. Maybe I'll get a gang of folks to all go and get their junk checked and make a day of it. Could be fun. Like Twister!

My friend George Noory told me he's moving to town. He might just be working down the hall from Phil Hendrie in Sherman Oaks. George is really a great guy and his show is getting better every day. Maybe just as he moves here, I'll be moving away to another station and market.

I got a call yesterday from the consultant, who's now flown out to Grand Rapids to the station to do what consultants do, and he tells me the PD never got my Morning Show demo package. I'm wondering if this is "Radio-Speak" for, "Sorry Dude, we're looking for someone else!".

I really wanted to get this gig, I could really do a number on market #66... 66? I've never been on the radio in a market less than #10 unless I was on an affiliate. Man, is my career goin' down!

Market Ranking: 66

Population (1997):(000) 822.0

Number of Households (1997):(000) 297.2
 
Retail Sales (1997)(000,000) 11,954.2
 
Estimated Growth revenues (2000): (000) $40,200
 
Estimate Growth rate (1998-2002): 5.9%%

Don't know what all this means, but all that and 8 Degrees above 0!

Boy, I could ROCK that town's world if they'd only give me a chance!